Tuesday, 25 September 2012

Minaj Mania, and Musical Misery..

Nicki Minaj. Quite possibly one of the worst artists to have ever walked on the surface of planet Earth.
Admittedly, that seems like a bold statement to make, since I'm no global megastar, but I'm confident that my words have more substance than her lyrical abilities. Here's a few examples of her illegible writing:

"I said, excuse me, you're a hell of a guy
I mean my, my , my, my, my, you're like pelican fly
I mean your so shy and I'm loving your tie
You're like slicker than the guy with the thing on his eye, oh
Yes I did, yes I did, somebody please tell him who the 'F' I is
I am Nicki Minaj, I mack them dudes up, back coupes up, and chuck the deuce up"

Honestly, the last time I read such gibberish was when I was scrolling through the comments on a Rolling Stones video, and to my horror, discovered a post which stated that "Justin Bieber iz likz the bestz singer evaaa, thiz is lyk old peeple musik. Get wiv the tymz peeple! Belieberz foreverrr". I finally concluded that this person was clearly deluded, and that the correct moral decision was indeed to dream  up new ways of destroying this abomination of society.

Anyhow, let's move this blog on to the main topic of this discussion, shall we?
Sadly, society is now at a stage where people believe these kind of lyrics are acceptable, and that they represent "good music". No. "Good music" is music that is written by people who put meaning behind their words. "Good music" is performed by people who can play instruments with a certain flare, in an incomparable manner. Let me put it to you like this. Jimmy Hendricks is renowned for his exceptional guitar playing. Nicki Minaj.... Exactly.
"Good music" is also performed by people who are popular, not because of their looks, but because of their talent. Artists such as Adele, Elbow, and a number of other, less well known artists.
This, my friends, is the biggest issue with the music industry. Success in this part of the woods is no longer governed by talent. Looks, and the potential to gain mass appeal among younger audiences. Money rules the roost. Honestly, when was the last time you heard a "Belieber" or a "Directioner" talking to their friends (It honestly amazes me they have any...) about how "Justin iz soooo hawt and fittt!" or "OMG! One Direction are lykz totes amaze!!"

"Why?! Why is modern society so blind to the corruption behind it all?" I hear the more intellectual among you cry. Well, it all boils down to this. Music executives take a mediocre singer, polish them up a bit, use a computer to produce a song with a "catchy" beat and autotuned vocals, and prepare to rake in the profit. I mean, the level of lust for One Direction, for example, has now gotten to a point where you can buy DOLLS of the band members. DOLLS! I mean you don't see Adele going around asking for people to cast her in plastic, do you? But, as long as young girls (And young teenagers) have some form of pop sensation to drool over, then they're completely ignorant to the sheer corruption they are being drawn into, and thus choose to retaliate against the  idea that "the beztizt singerrrs everrrr" are in fact, nothing more than auto-tuned greedy turds.

What happened to the days where artists moved milions, where artists wrote songs that mattered, where people were united in harmony by the "Boom-boom-clap" of Queens "We Will Rock You", the days where artists left a legacy to be proud of?

I may have been born in 1998, but as a massive fan of classic rock, there's nowhere I'd rather be right now than in the crowd of a Rolling Stones concert in Hyde Park, London, July 1969.


  1. totally agree :D bet half the people who are famous for their "incredibly musical talent" wouldn't even be able to read basic sheet music it's a shame some of the best artists aren't as popular as they should be like Nina Nesbitt or Two Door Cinema Club...just for some examples :L I wish we could go back and live in a time when music actually meant something and mattered to the artists as well as the listeners and it could unite the world with a simple iconic base line (boom-boom-clap!)