Friday, 28 September 2012

"SWAG" and "YOLO" : A beginners guide to delinquency..

Ah, the English language. Spoken globally, it's the mother tongue of over 375 million people.
Sadly, it's also the language spoken by some of the dumbest, most worthless people on Earth.

Yes folks, I'm indeed referring to the "sheep" of society, the people who follow popular trends like a moth round a light bulb. And, when the light is turned off, the moth flies away, to find another source of entertainment. I realize that was a terrible metaphor, but there really is no other way of expressing the effects of pop-culture.
These people take the English language, and literally tear it apart, creating new phrases that ripple throughout the younger generations, with occasionally disastrous consequences.

Recently, while browsing the web, I came cross an acronym that until that point, was unheard of. SWAG. Naturally, being curious as to the meaning of this new "trending phrase", I decided to pursue the definition of this strange new formation of letters. I promptly popped on Urban Dictionary, and discovered that that society's stupidity had finally been uncovered. You see, SWAG is a phrase generally used by today's youth to describe how "cool" something, or someone is. Clearly, the vain douche-bags who use this word overlooked a small, but rather significant detail.
The phrase SWAG is actually an acronym created way back in the 60's, by a group of homosexuals . The real meaning? Secretly We Are Gay. Honestly, you'd think people would do a little more research...

This, my friends, brings me neatly onto the topic of the phrase "YOLO", or You Only Live Once.
Again, it seems this phrase was created by someone with the level of imagination you might find in the skull of a 100 year old corpse, because it's pretty damn obvious that once you die, well, your dead.
Somehow, young teenage girls simply choose to ignore the literal meaning behind the phrase, and instead prefer to use it as some form of "get outta jail free card". They seem to have decided that by saying "YOLO" whenever they do something stupid, crazy, immature or down right insane, that the action is justified and irrelevant. Now, as nice as the ideal of being able to excuse yourself from everything by using a simple 4 letter acronym might sound, I can promise you that saying "YOLO" isn't going to take care of the baby you're giving birth to at age 14. Nor will it calm your parents down when they find out you've been doing drugs and drinking all night. All the word states is "I know what I should be doing in life, but I'm going to ruin it instead, because there's no point in living if you don't do something stupid."
This makes no sense. Sure, life is, after all, worth living. But you have nearly 80 years to go crazy. why bother doing something stupid when you've got so much to learn about the world? Trust me, it's better to be a little conservative, and stay safe and content, than messing your whole life up by doing something that you're going to regret until the day you're six feet under.

Think before you act people. A word won't save your skin. Common sense will.


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